Dinner theater

In the previous post I alluded to some feeding issues in the Mautino household.  This topic may be TMI for some, but here it is. 

By the second day in the hospital I really thought we had the breast feeding thing down.  The first night, not so much, even with all of Cayce's help.  However, after some rest I thought Lily and I had come to an understanding.  Knowing that I happily left the hospital with my baby and looked forward bringing her home.  Once home the feedings didn't seem so hot.  There was only one good feeding during the day, and the rest of the feedings were fussy and ineffective.  Lily did not sleep that first night.  We were back to a baby who demanded she be held in order to sleep.  Cayce and I were desperate.  We even tried a pacifier.  That did allow us about 45 mins of rest, but she was back to crying and rooting.  Her frustration was so apparent.  My heart was breaking for her.  Cayce and I were exhausted that second day.  I tried to nap, but no such luck.  We had company and peace was not to be found.  That night I cried to Cayce.  My anxiety about the night time was palpable.  I knew I wasn't feeding Lily enough, but everyone kept telling me she was fine, babies get fussy.  I could not spend another night sitting up holding her, but it's what had to be done.  I thought maybe this is just what motherhood was supposed to be like.  Maybe my lot was to stay up a night consoling Lily and maybe napping during the day.  Lily had a doctor's appointment the next morning, and I was dreading what I would hear from the Ped.  I just knew he was going to tell me Lily would have to be a formula fed.  I know it shouldn't matter how my baby is fed as long as she's fed, but I WANT to breast feed.  I know it's what's best for her, and it shouldn't (in my mind) have been that hard.  It's literally second nature.  Not for us.

We made it to our appointment in the morning, and I was a ball of nerves.  Lily was weighed and she came in at 7 lbs.  7 lbs.  Remember when she was born, 4 short days earlier, she weighed 7lbs 15 oz.  I had starved my baby.  How could I have been so stupid?  Of course that's why she was fussy and miserable, she wasn't eating.  Dr. E discussed the situation, and it turns out my milk had not come in.  Even though she had the dramatic weight loss, he didn't tell us it was time to switch to formula.  He believes breast milk is the best, and he gave us some great tips for helping bring in the milk.  In the mean time he wanted me to continue to try to breast feed, and after each feeding supplement with an ounce of formula.  Okay.  We can do that.  Dr. E asked us to come in the next day and we'll weigh her again and see where we are as far as my milk.  I left the office with a sense of hope, and excited to have a plan of action.  On our way home Cayce stopped at a GNC and picked up the Fenugeek supplement Dr. E suggested I take, and bought a bottle of beer Dr. E told me to drink.  In the car I took the Fenugeek, and we hurried home.  As soon as we got home we prepared a small bottle of formula, and Cayce got to feed Lily for the first time.  It was special for all of us.  Lily was clearly thrilled to be eating,  Cayce was excited to feed his baby, and I was relieved to know Lily was being fed.

                                                                       Proud Poppa!
Following the feeding I had lunch and headed to the bed for a nap.  I napped for about an hour, and then was awoken by company.  When I woke up I felt different.  Low and behold my milk had come in!  I tried nursing, but after a few long days of Lily working diligently for something that was not there she refused to latch.  No problem.  I was not discouraged.  I pumped!  She LOVED the breast milk!  She gobbled it down.  Cayce and I worked a routine.  I would try for a few mins with regular feeding, and then when Lily made it clear she was not going to latch I'd hand her over to Cayce he'd give her a formula bottle, and I'd pump.  This worked really well for us.  The miracle of it all, besides a happy fed baby, Lily slept through the night, except for when I woke her up to feed.  It was wonderful.  The next day we returned to Dr. E's and our baby had gained 2 ounces!  Dr. E was thrilled, and I was thrilled to tell him the story of my milk coming in.  Lily was given a clean bill o' health, and we were told to come back for her 2 week check-up.

Cayce and I continued our routine for a few more days, but supplementing more breast milk as my supply grew.  Lily continued sleep through the night, so well in fact, that on the third night my alarm did not go off for the 2 o'clock feeding and she did not wake us up until 4:00.  She was apparently SOOOO hungry at the 4:00 hour that she actually latched!  We ran with that.  I was doing scheduled feedings with Lily, but decided to do feeding on demand, but ensuring she does not go more than 3 hours during the day without eating.  Lily has latched awesomely, and we're still supplementing here and there with formula just so Cayce can enjoy feeding her, and she can get some vitamin A.  Yesterday was a doozy.  She was literally feeding about every hour and a half, and I feared what last night would bring, but nope she slept from her 11:00 PM feeding until 4:30 AM, granted she woke me up an hour later demanding to be fed again, but she happily took a bottle and slept again until nearly 9:00.  She's on a better schedule today, going 2 and a half to 3 hours between feedings.  I'm feeling very grateful to be able to feed Lily.  It's silly I know, but I've always known I would breast feed my children and when it looked like that wouldn't be the case for Lily I was crushed.  Hopefully we'll keep it up! I'm also grateful for the amazing amount of support Cayce gave me during this time.  I'm glad he went to the breast feeding class with me and was able to help me keep my cool and remind me of techniques.  Cayce's been on paternity leave, and I could not imagine doing these first 12 days without his help.  It's going to be very sad tomorrow when he returns to work, and I'll count the hours til he comes home to Lily and me. On the shallow side Lily's helped me lose 35lbs so far, and I actually think I may be to my pre-pregnant weight by my 6 week postpartum check-up. :-D